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marc

11/23/2017

5 Comments

 
       The Figure In The distance


It was a mysterious dark night the trees creaking making a terrifying noise. Emma was carefully making her way through the forest as she felt a tremble in the ground, as quickly as she could the little girl ran to a tree to hold on to. As soon as she grabbed hold of the prickly tree it stopped, everything even more quiet than before. Slowly letting go of the tree,  the girl was scared of what could happen, snap! a noise that was so scary she tucked herself into a ball. Taking her hands away from her face she saw an extraordinary statue.

By Marc

​
5 Comments
Hubert
11/23/2017 08:48:20 am

Marc this was amazing! You used really good adverbs. Adjectives were great as well. You did a really entertaining story. Which I really enjoyed.
But what happened next after she saw the statue.

Reply
James
11/23/2017 09:02:54 am

I really like how this story unfolded and I like that you didn't make a silly mistake in your spelling! I would love to know what happens next!

Reply
Obinna
11/23/2017 09:45:41 am

Great story Marc. I think your story was very interesting. If I had to say something, it would be to remember to put a comma after a sentence opener.

Reply
Colm
11/23/2017 11:17:47 am

Hi Mark! Nice story, it is a really good story, one thing though, make sure you put in commas in where they are going to go(just personally suggestion).

Reply
Pierre
11/23/2017 11:21:12 am

Hi marc this story was great and I enjoyed it and you had good adjectives like creaking for eg. Thank you for commenting on my story

Reply



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